Peace Tribute - Francis Joseph Stulgaitis

Note: The following was to be read at Dad's 65th College reunion at Columbia University of New York last week (thanks to the graciousness of Class of 40 coordinator Seth Neugroschl) but due to technical difficulties this memorandum did not reach him in time. Seth requested a passage on peace as Columbia alumni are striving to make peace a legacy their class bestows on future generations.

The first time Dad and I talked about peace was only a few years ago in the kitchen of his red state home. He was sitting at the breakfast table, reading his two newspapers, both conservative dailies, one perhaps a bit less right of center than the other. Uncharacteristically, no one else was home...it was just the two of us and I felt a bit hesitant starting up a conversation with him. We'd never actually talked candidly about politics but at that time, less than a year after 9/11, I felt myself angry whenever faced with 'war on terror' newspaper headlines; hard pressed not to comment on the administration's latest aggressive posturing.

I think I blurted out something about not wanting us to go to war, half expecting him to ignore my outburst...but to my surprise he agreed with me. In fact, we were in perfect accord: protective and patriotic for our homeland, emotionally anguished as only former New Yorkers could be... but also highly disturbed by the alarming drums of war sounding throughout the country. It was a moment of true poignency: at once one of the most tumultous times in my life and the one of the most awe-inspiring as I realized that my 80 + year old Dad, former pillar of industry, red state resident, and the best man I'd ever known, was in his own way a soft-spoken lefty, who knew???

From that day onward, whenever I'd be home for a visit, Dad and I lamented the direction our country was taking...away from peace, away from a path of prudence and security we felt was more befitting our great nation. Each time we spoke, even though I felt great angst over our nation's policies, I also experienced a great and unique kinship of spirit with Dad that trancended the traditional bonds of father and daughter. We were united in a mutual truth and respect borne of common ground. I treasure these memories of Dad. I can only hope that perhaps one day someone will feel that way about me.